Have you ever been with someone that was with you but in their emotions, they were far from you? Is there a way to change someone that is emotionally unavailable or to even change yourself?
How can you meet someone that will be emotionally available to you? No one deserves to be with someone that is not available to them. When you are available in your emotions, you try harder and you desire to have a better life and a better future.
If you want to be emotionally available to someone that you love, you have to make sure that you are giving yourself the emotional availability that you need.
What is Emotional Unavailability?
Being emotional unavailable means that you put up barriers where you refuse to let people in. This can mean that you won’t share secret things in your soul to others. Sometimes this happens because someone has a bad past or something traumatic happened to them when they were younger.
This kind of situation can come from your childhood or it can happen because you had something happen to you such as heartbreak and you were worried of opening yourself up to someone again. This can be a time where you fall apart inside, and you have pain in your heart that was so hard to handle that you never felt you would make it through.
No matter how available you want to be after that, it is hard. You find people attractive and you love to be around them, but you still find that you cannot be available to them.
You show disrespect to them because of your behavior and you put up red flags that drive people away. You blame others for your actions and the truth is, you need to see what is going on in your life.
You will attract the same things you put in the universe. You are not available to someone if you allow them to open up to you, but you never do the same.
Even people that are available sometimes will experience emotional unavailability. This can happen when someone that they love dies or when they are under a lot of pressure or stress.
People that are always unavailable though make the choice to be this way and they learned to operate under these conditions. If you want to have true love, you have to learn to be open to people around you.
What is Emotional Availability?
Being emotionally available means that you are able to talk about things that are painful and emotions that you don’t want to face. You are able to tell others how you feel without avoiding this and without running away.
You cannot allow others to dictate what you are feeling but when you are vulnerable to someone you love, things in the relationship open up.
What Does this Mean?
Here are some things that people do when they are emotionally available:
- Become aware of themselves.
- Learn to reflect on themselves.
- Show their fears.
- Show their shame.
- Admit when they are insecure but live a good life through it.
- They do not depend on others to tell them if they are right or wrong.
- They are vulnerable but it scares them, and they know that is okay.
- They are kind and loving to themselves.
- They have self-compassion.
- They are open with their emotions all the time.
- They have desires and they are okay with that.
- They don’t feel selective, but they reach for the good.
- They connect with others.
- They aren’t jealous.
- They aren’t attracted to others that are not available to them.
How to Be Emotionally Available
If you want to be emotionally available to someone you have to learn to open up and to look inside of yourself. You have to realize that you have fears and quirks and face them.
Having a life that is wasted or never experiencing love or joy is worse than being vulnerable. You have to love yourself and be kind and forgiving to yourself like you are to others and you need to have self-compassion.
Think about how you care about what others feel and learn to feel that way towards yourself. Never give up on who you are.
Write down things that you are uncomfortable with and scared of. Doing this can allow you to see your feelings. Look at your life and see if you are vulnerable and honest with who you are. Be sincere and be open.
Learn to have peace in your life.
No matter what you do or what you go through, being available to others will help you to attract those that are loving and compassionate. You might be afraid but that is okay because you are strong, and you are good enough to be open with others. Share your life and share your love.