How to Conquer Fear

Those who have problems in life, whether it is a career change or problems in relationships, tend to have one thing in common: fear.

Fear kills. It kills opportunities, romance, and even finances. There is a story about three workers. Their boss was going on a faraway trip and wanted them to manage his investments. He gave the first employee 10 accounts to handle, the second 5 accounts and the last 1 account.

The first employee took the accounts, reinvested the money in them in areas the boss hadn’t even thought of while the second did nothing with the account. He just checked it some to make sure it was all there and grew some.

The third employee grew worried the market would drop, so he took every time out and put it in a safe deposit box.

When the boss returned, he asked how everything did. The first showed him all the profits. The second showed him some interest added. He went to the third.

The third employee explained he knew the boss would be angry if he lost his money, so he took it out and put it in a safe deposit box where it would be accounted for when he returned.

The boss was angry. He asked why didn’t the employee at least put it into a savings account where it could gain some interest instead of paying a safe deposit box bill every month to hold it.

While the first two were rewarded, the third received nothing.

The moral of the story is to not let fear rule you but use all you have to generate wealth. Wealth can be in talent, in education or actual money. Failing to use your abilities to generate a life of substance will lead to you obtaining nothing of any value.

How do you do that?

Below are seven ways you can overcome fear and obtain your life goals:

1. Fear is not insurmountable.

It is real and there may be valid reasons for it, but it can be overcome. Realize that fear causes stress, so when you are stressed look for why you are afraid.

Most fear comes from the idea that you are not in control. It is hard to be out of control of something. You feel like you’re spinning and simply awaiting your fate.

While there are things you can’t control, there are plenty of things you can. The number one thing you can control is your reaction to the thing making your fearful and how you handle fear.

2. Accept that fear is real.

Denying that you have fear will only give it more power over you. Own it so you can then deal with it head-on.

3. Put it into perspective.

Even though the fear is real, you may have already given it way too much priority. That only serves to stress you out more and gives your fear more power over you. This tends to make you paralyzed in doing anything about it because you have made it so huge that it feels insurmountable.

Stop. Put it in perspective. Will this thing kill you or put you in some physical risk? Most of the time, the answer is no. Then, the question becomes what is the worst that can happen? Once you’ve answered this question, you may find your fears are greatly reduced.

The other way to put it in perspective is to follow up that question with, what can you do if the worst were to happen? What is your plan B? Answering this question will empower you in the situation and give you some sense of control.

4. Find support.

Finding someone to help as you work through your fear is important. It needs to be someone you know and trust as you will be sharing your deepest self with them. It could be your significant other, a best friend or even a professional life coach. Whoever it is, this person needs to be your cheerleader, be supportive, but also offer you some accountability.

5. Know that fear can’t touch some things.

Fear can only touch those things you allow it to touch. You are the sole one making that decision. It can’t touch your mind or your character. It can’t touch a sunset or faith. It can’t touch real love in someone you trust.

6. Use your fear for good.

Understand that you are not your fear. It doesn’t have to define you unless you allow it to do that. You can use it to build courage or a new skill set.

Many people face fear when they encounter something different. For instance, those in lockdown with the COVD-19 pandemic were legitimately afraid. Yet, many chose to not let that fear become part of their natural state of being. They became proactive in protecting themselves and managing their time at home to make the most of the situation.

Many learned they could homeschool their children. Others took time out to take an online class or meet people online in a different country. Many learned how to podcast their musical, dance or artistic talents or how to document their personal experience.

7. Process fear and move on.

One you consider the reasons and outcomes of your fear, you can process it and then move forward. Moving forward may be facing your fear or it may be waiting to see if it comes to pass. Either way, you can’t let fear stall you in your life.

Everyone is afraid sometimes. Once you learn how to deal with fear, you can find the courage to face it and even climb over it to success. Fear can be a huge mountain, but as the saying goes faith the size of a mustard seed can move mountains.